The Trust

Relationships and Friendships are integral part of life. And they say that "trust" is one of the basic aspects for any bonding to happen. Be it relationship of any kind or Friendship for that matter. But to define trust is a little complicated, I would say. Trust at different levels say what two persons have for each other and the level at which they connect. I have deep thoughts and views about trust in friendship. For a sensible, intellectual and an epic best friendship to happen, too many things have to fall in place. To sum all of the requisites in brief, two persons trying to bond as friends should be sensible, connect intellectually and personally at the same level, non-judgmental (at least about each other) and trust each other. To connect intellectually is easy as long as two persons' appetite to acquire knowledge is approximately at the same level. At this point the connection happens and they enjoy each others' company so much. However, to move further and connect personally takes a long way to go. Trust plays a critical role here. 

While deeply examining the need and basis for "trust" to happen, I would like to put forth various characters of "nowadays subjects of friendship" It is a new cool to claim themselves "non-judgmental" nowadays, thereby putting a mask over their mind to prevent anyone from reading their mind, may be. But eventually, everyone is judgmental and assign character based upon personal interaction with the second person thereby drawing a conclusion about the second person. 

Then comes the "ego". Healthy, personal and intellectual best friendships seldom happens. Before you could sink in to my previous statement there is a disclaimer to make. Best Friends who connect only intellectually are not even taken into account here. They stay in the intellectual world with little bit of ego, however, as long as they don't get into "the personal zone", the trust is nearly immaterial. Coming back, ego makes most of the best friends stay frenemy while they claim themselves to be the "Best Friends Forever". Ego may start with being smart and ends at the personal life of two persons. Judgement often starts here. One interesting thing to notice here is that when a person is met for the first time, people tend to gauge his/her being smart, intelligent and cool and assign standards to the person. When the person is likely to go above the standards set, "intimidation" creeps in. The name given to the feeling is "ego" because the term ego makes them feel superior. This is one perspicuous reason that I have noticed.

Change is the only constant in life while people are not often ready to welcome change. A person can change his/her views and thoughts for good or can they change themselves for good. However, when the change happens, there always comes judgments. 

Two friends, who claim themselves to be the best buddies of each other are never entirely true to each other. Disappointments towards each other are not talked out among themselves but are spoken out where trust breaks. Nowadays, at least one of the two subjects of friendships refrains from trusting the other profoundly and genuinely. This may not be so apparent to the world but all the friendships go through what they call a "boardroom politics". "Never trust anyone" has become the motto of any relationship. People find place on Facebook but seldom find place in the hearts of friends. There cannot be disappointment-free friendship. But it is very much possible to display a true friendship where "genuine I will stand by you" makes it heartfelt, soulful and fervent. 

I, personally have subjected and have been subjected to judgments, ego and I have noticed whatever I have mentioned so far, in many of the friendships. As a 21 year old, I feel that it is time to change a little in order to make true and real best friendships. Trust and be trustworthy. Life is beautiful and friendship teaches lessons to life. I do not want to give a philosophical ending to this by enlisting ways to make a good friend. But those who empathize with me, give it a thought.